I enjoyed reading this, Linda. It encapsulates precisely the dillemas we face in mid life. As for me, I am beyond dreaming and actually living it!

Now in my eighties I can look back on a few mistakes (like the time in my forties when I decided to become a full time politician and writer. That didn't work out too well!) But my trainng and experience as an Engineer kept me and my missus fed and housed.

In my fifties I created a beautiful, though small, garden from nothing whilst working full time and undertaking voluntary work in my community.

In my seventies I created another garden from scratch, this one a bit bigger. I've also self-published a few books, sold a handful of paintings and contribute occasionally to Medium.

I compare my gardening efforts to parenthood. You can watch sappliings become trees, small shrubs expand to crowd out weaker plants. It's also like painting and writing. You can edit and play around with the design, constantly improving as the man in beer ad says.

I've also had the pleasure of watching my son's career evolve as he has become an expert at talking therapies and, more recently, my grand daughter follow in my footsteps as an Engineer.

As I sit enjoying the present heat wave in my own little bit of paradise, my wife of 60 years beside me, I can't help thinking that whatever comes next could not possibly be better.